Rihanna and A$AP Rocky’s baby boy hasn’t even had his first birthday yet, but he’s already gracing major magazine covers! The family of three — soon to be four — appear on the front of British Vogue’s March issue, in which the 35-year-old singer reflects on her journey to motherhood and life with her partner.

The singer describes her first months as a mother as “legendary,” adding, “It’s everything. You really don’t remember life before, that’s the craziest thing ever.”

“You literally try to remember it – and there are photos of my life before – but the feeling, the desires, the things that you enjoy, everything, you just don’t identify with it because you don’t even allow yourself mentally to get that far, because…” she says. “Because it doesn’t matter.”

“Essentially, from one person I became two. You walk into the hospital as a couple and leave as a family of three. It’s nuts,” the singer says, reflecting on giving birth. “And oh, my gosh, those first days are insane. You don’t sleep. At all. Not even if you wanted to. We came home, cold turkey, and had no one. It was just us as parents and our baby. Man, you’re a zombie for the most part. You’re just going through the motions and even then you’re so paranoid. Because you’re like: they trusted us to come home with this baby? No doctors, no nurses, we’re just… going home?”